Risk management is specific.
written by Julie R. Neidlinger 3 comments link this postI've been over-managing my risk.
In a letter I just finished writing to a "new" pen pal (letters are a fine thing, people! I can't stress that enough!), I wrote about comfort and risk and how it plays into happiness.
I really started thinking about risk, though, after I sealed the letter up.
Risk is less the decision that agrees in the mind that Something Must Happen while doing nothing to make it so, but it is more the action.
What else might risk be? I thought, and started jotting a list in my journal.
Risk is doing.
Risk is taking stock of what scares and finding a way to dive in and learn from it. Maybe.
Risk is breaking free from the comforting routines.
Risk sometimes shrugs off comfort in search of the better thing out there.
Risk is doing what you know you should but just never get around to it.
Risk is people. People are very risky.
Risk is going after what you want, but you have to be willing to admit you want it.
In a recent Sunday school class, we all somehow got around to talking about marriage and prayer and that kind of thing. I can't remember how we ended up on the topic, but members of the class started relating stories of specific prayers they made, and how God answered them very specifically. One man even said that when he'd prayed for a wife, he asked that she have blond hair. It was around that point where I sort of tuned out. There were a few reasons for my tuning out, but one had to do with the fact that I don't pray specifically. These stories that were being relayed made me think how happy I was that things had worked out so fine and dandy for them, but that it was a far different view from where I sat.
But why would I get specific answers? I rarely pray specifically.
"God, I bring to you such-and-such a situation. You know what's best God. I trust you to take care of it," I might pray. It sounds good, but a life time of general prayers that seem to portray trust but really show a lack of faith because nothing that would put it all on the line is ever asked for is a life of no risk at all. A lifetime of just sitting by and letting it all flow and saying to myself an others, "Hey, let's take it easy and just see what develops" means a lifetime of it all flowing right on by and leaving me behind.
It is much more difficult to say exactly what I'd like and then take the yes's and no's in the same stride. It is easier to ask for nothing and never know if the answer ever comes. It is easier to put the work load (and subsequent blame, when nothing happens) on "fate." It is more difficult to just get out and seize the day, the moment, the opportunity, the person, the chance, the open door...
Whether it be praying specifically or refusing to let people and opportunities fall out of my grasp because I want to see whether or not they'll "develop" instead of developing myself and taking some purposeful action, I've got to take some risks.
So I made some other lists. I've gone specific, and in many areas of my life at that! It's a real risk. It's embarrassing to admit I'm praying for specific things that seem shallow and unimportant and ridiculous. I can't see how it would matter. Oh yes, it is a real risk.
How refreshing.
Labels: church life, essay, journals, relationships, religion
Copyright (c) Julie R. Neidlinger 11/02/2007 12:47:00 AM
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3 Comments:
In these matters I like to remember my friend Ed, one of the smartest and funniest guys I know, who has an encyclopedic knowledge of the Bible, was a math and philosophy major in college.
Evangelical free. No one's perfect.
Many years ago I asked him about prayer. While doing a math problem I couldn't figure out, he told me to pray for wisdom. I don't know if it helped, but for some reason it had never occurred to me.
So, wisdom…that's general.
But I also heard him pray for specific things, like good weather for a certain upcoming event, or a safe road trip.
In high school chemistry class I used to pray that the teacher wouldn't call on me. You think that wasn't a real prayer? Oh yes it was! In a public school no less (gasp).
I'm glad to report that I no longer pray for sports teams.
By 
, at
2/11/07 11:40
There's a balance. The guy who prayed for a blonde makes me recoil--if only because I would have prayed for a brunette, and if God had honored that, I would have missed out on Cecile.
Submitting to God's wisdom is not a bad thing.
But also hedging our bets by praying too-general prayers, or cover-all-the-possible-outcomes prayers, is also not good. The best answer I've ever seen comes from Richard Foster's Celebration of Discipline: essentially, we spend time in prayer getting to know God and seeking for His wisdom, so that when a specific situation comes up, we're guided by Him to know the right direction in which to pray.
I wish I were better at the practice than the theory.
By 
Keith Schooley, at
4/11/07 07:29
Personally, I can't fathom praying for hair color or that specific. I did, however, write down what specifics I would include in prayers of this nature, and they veered towards specific things dealing with a loving, patient, gentle nature... nothing about hair or stuff like that.
That sounds a little too pat...it's not intended to. I need to post on it in greater detail, because I also wrote out specific things I wanted done in me so that I could offer another person some very specific, positive things.
I need to post in better detail when I'm not in need of my Old Person's Sunday Nap. Perhaps later, in which case I hope you comment on it.
But now, nap time.
By Julie R. Neidlinger, at
4/11/07 15:53
