Conversations: She's got legs.
written by Julie R. Neidlinger 4 comments link this post
If you know me, you know my feelings on spiders. I'm not totally heartless, however. I believe spiders should be either totally left alone (i.e. run away screaming), or smashed into oblivion.
As I attempted to close the kitchen window before going to bed a few nights ago, I noticed a large garden spider had situated herself between the screen and the glass, up near where the window would pinch shut when closed. She was huge, one of those round, gushy spiders - (pause in typing while dry heaves leave me) - I don't even want to talk about it.
I began to roll the window closed, hoping the spider would move out of the way of danger because the thought of squishing that huge full-of-guts spider - (dry heaves again) - the spider moved a bit but not enough. The window was closed and the spider was twitching around with a leg stuck in the closed ledge.
The spider was twitching around. Oh, dear God, it was so awful. My skin was crawling. This big, black round thing with legs and probably monstrous fangs if I bothered to look - terrible.
"Dad!" I said, "I just crunched that spider's leg in the window!" I quickly opened the window to see the 40 pound monster drop on a strand of silk out of sight, one leg bent oddly. "I think I wrecked its leg."
I'm no monster. Like I said, spiders live in one piece or get smashed (by someone else, if possible) into nothingness. I felt bad about the partial carnage I had wrought.
"I feel bad about the spider," I said. "One of its legs is ruined!"
Dad rolled his eyes. "It's got plenty of other legs."
And that's kind of the whole, disgusting point, isn't it?
(heaves.)
Labels: conversations, my life, nature
Copyright (c) Julie R. Neidlinger 5/30/2006 12:11:00 AM
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4 Comments:
I don't mean to make things worse, but you might as well face reality. She (the spider) knows who did that to her, and we all know how vengeful spiders are.
You need to go back and finish the job. Otherwise, get used to sleeping with one eye open.
By 
Eric, at
30/5/06 08:20
So I have to ask - have you seen the commercial for the Yaris, where the car crushes a mechanical spider? A friend and I were discussing it the other day - I hadn't seen it yet at that point, but I saw it last night, and it creeps me out.
By 
, at
30/5/06 10:19
You know, Eric, what's not funny about your comment is that I almost think that's true.
Too much SciFi to not think that a possibility.
Ugh.
And no, I've never seen the car commercial. I would probably have to leave the room.
By Julie, at
30/5/06 10:28
Personally, I wouldn't have stopped with just one of it's legs. :)
By denise, at
31/5/06 01:13
