'Tis the season to start sending out Christmas cards. You could buy some of my cards, of course, but if you're more in the mood to make your own, I have a few ideas that might spice up your mailing repertoire. Or alienate your friends.

SANTA IN A BAG

To create this card, you will need:

• Tiny snack-sized Ziploc or craft bags (we're talking really, really tiny)
• scraps of red craft or construction paper
• scraps of cotton
• scraps of black paper or shiny black craft material
• card stock (for the actual card base)

The idea behind "Santa in a bag" is that you don't have to be a great artist, nor will you need trillions of dollars of stamping and craft supplies. Simply put a few pieces of the red scrap paper, a piece or two of the black, and a few tufts of cotton into the craft bag. If you want to be a little more involved, you can cut the black into boot shapes, and the red into pant, jacket and hat shapes. But you don't have to do that, if you don't want, to make this card work.

Somewhere on the front of your card, you'll need to either stamp, write with pen or use your computer to put the words "Santa in a Bag". It's inside where you get to have a little fun, depending on the kind of person you are. Are you a hunter, a member of NRA, or just want to upset your peace-loving friends? Use "I bagged Santa" as your tagline inside. Or maybe you want to go for something more cute. In that case, use "Just add water!" as your tagline inside. One word of caution: it's a regretful shame, but there will be people out there who will take you literally and utterly destroy your card. That's the chance you take when you unleash your keen wit on your more literal friends.

TREE IN A BAG

This card is the same idea as the "Santa in a bag" card, except you'll be using green and brown paper instead of the red, black and white elements needed for Santa. You might also want to include some glitter or bits of tinsel so that the idea is more of a "Christmas Tree in a bag" instead of just a generic tree. If you're in the mood to irritate your environmentalist friends, or just have a sick sense of humor all year 'round, you might want to include, in small print at the bottom of the card either on the inside or the back, the following disclaimer: A tree was killed, pulped, dyed green and made into paper to make this instant tree card. It's just a fun idea.

PIECE VS. PEACE

Perhaps you'd like to be a bit more cryptic this Christmas. To create this card, you will need:

• jigsaw puzzle pieces
• card stock (for actual card base)

You could either paint the puzzle piece some kind of Christmasy colors and use glitter, or leave it as is for this card. Simply glue the piece on the front of the card, either towards the left side or centered towards the top. Then, either to the right of the puzzle piece or centered below it, write or stamp the words "on earth".

You're slower friends may never get this card. I apologize for that. Think of it as a kind of litmus test in that case.

TIPS FOR THE SERIOUS CARD MAKER

So you're a serious card-maker and wouldn't think of messing with the holiday tradition of card giving by using these off-key ideas. Very well. I'll leave you with just a few tips and ideas so that your cards look their best.

1. Less is more. Please, for the love of all that is good and holy, remember this. The trend in so much of the card-making scrap-booking stamping world is to load every card down with every piece of raffia and craft paper and ink color and button ever made. Do not do this! The less the visual clutter, the stronger the message. Use a palette of two or three colors. Don't use more than four.
2. Dull colors aren't actually dull. Think sage greens and low-key maroons instead of color-crayon red and green. Think silver and blue, or muted green and gold, as possible color combinations.
3. Use a simple item as your "theme" image. For example, one year I collected tiny red leaves during the fall. For my Christmas card, I adhered a single leaf in the center of the front of my card. The card itself was a muted sage green. I drew a small line of fine, white glitter beneath the red leaf, making the card look like there was a small red tree standing in the snow. You could do that, or try something with buttons, matchsticks, feathers, the round punched paper leftovers from a hole punch, etc. Let the object prompt you for the inside. For example, the feather could be from a wing of an angel, and your message inside could relate to that. The match (already lit and burned out for safety, of course) could be tied into candles or light at Christmas. Be creative. Keep it simple.
4. Use old wrapping paper to make envelopes for your cards. Simple disassemble an envelope, trace it on the back of the wrapping paper, fold, glue, and voila: a beautiful envelope. You'll want to use an address label, though, because busy envelope patterns make the postal workers even more postal. It's a busy season. No need to harass them.

IF YOU'RE A WRITER

Maybe you're a writer and you're thinking "who the heck cares about all this art junk?" Good point. For you, the obvious way to use your craft is to write a Christmas story, poem or essay and use that as your Christmas card or greeting. If you're going to ramble on about how great your family is and all the wonderful, great things you did this year, take my advice: don't bother. No one cares. Christmas letters are irritating.

But if you were to do some creative writing, some non-cheesy poetry, a challenging or funny essay, a story, or maybe even a serial story where you send out a chapter periodically throughout December so that your recipient has the final part of the story very near Christmas...now that would be something worth getting.

In general? If it's boring or full of mindless bragging, please don't waste our time. But creativity? Now that's something to have the postman bring.

---------------

GIFT CERTIFICATES

If you're like me, everything is an insane competition. I have to give unique gifts (which is code language for "strange" and "weird" and "what's this for" kinds of gifts) that no one else gives. Let's hope you're not like me. Still, if you're in need of a unique gift idea but not sure where to turn, try a Lone Prairie Gift Certificate. They're good for an entire year, so whoever is on the receiving end has lots of time to decide what to buy.

---------------

BOB WORLD

Bob, the little red-headed doll, has his own world.

That's right. Welcome to Bob World, where you can get in on the Bob fan fiction blog, a living photographic essay on places Bob happens to turn up. You can also download free Bob stuff, from bookmarks to posters to a sample chapter from his upcoming book. Check out Bob World at www.officialbob.com.

---------------

Until next time,