Julie R. Neidlinger: Lone Prairie Art Works

I'm putting together plenty of words.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 0 comments link this post

I did not do NaNoWriMo this year. As it turns out, because of various issues in my family that have come up, it is a good thing I didn't have that stress. However, I'm still churning out a "story" with thousands of words.

A picture is worth a thousand words.

And I've been steadily working on a project in which I have told myself to complete at least a page every two days. I have been busy with pencils and inking pens and erasers, and some day, when I get a large stack of pages and I decide I have enough.... I'm going to kick that measly 50,000 word NaNoWriMo total to the ground.

So to speak.

The best thing about NaNoWriMo isn't the generally lackluster novels that are cranked out, but the fact that it serves to spur people on from being, as one of NaNoWriMo's downloadable posters puts it, a "one day novelist" (i.e. "one day I'd like to be a novelist").

I'm spurring myself on, with this project. It's a challenge. Do you know how much contortion it takes to spur yourself on?

You imagine that for a minute.

I'm not forcing a time constraint for completion, like NaNoWriMo, but I am forcing myself to write and draw and ink and I'm finding that with the continued focus, whether forced or "inspired", I'm able to actually produce.

It's late. It's been a long day full of work and personal challenges, but I have a page to produce and I have an idea on which to build it.

Didn't do NaNoWriMo?

Do it your own way. Kick your own butt. Produce whatever it is your talent produces, even if it's crap. Once you get that out of your system, you'd be amazed at what's been hiding under it all this time.

Labels: nanowrimo

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I would hate her if I didn't like her.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 1 comments link this post

Hate is probably the wrong word, it being very strong and virulent.

However, if Corrine were not my friend, my extreme envy of her writing success and marketing genius would have me spinning with something virulent. Whatever virulent thing spins.

New book out? Check.

Ready for NaNoWriMo? Check. And double check (for cleverness).

Blast her success.

Sigh.

Labels: nanowrimo, writing life

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Don't talk about it.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 3 comments link this post

You lose it if you talk about it.
-- Ernest Hemingway

I was talking with a friend last night, and she asked me what my forlorn little NaNoWriMo novel was about. I was hesitant to tell her, but not because I wanted to withhold information from a friend. Instead, it has to do with not wanting to talk about what I'm doing.

I am frequently asked by people what I'm working on now, what new projects and ideas I'm busy with. I try as best as I can to answer without answering. This is one reason I struggle with writers' group. I try to let people know what I'm working on, as we are "required" to do in the group, without building up expectation or killing the interest inside of me. It's also connected to a lesson I learned in art critique sessions during college: never bring in unfinished work for a critique. By the time critique is over, you'll never want to touch the art again, and it will sit, unfinished. Everything you could have done or might have done or were thinking of doing will be talked into oblivion and that will be that.

If I tell someone about the new paintings I'm working on, and then, while painting, decide to go in a different direction or scrap it all together, I face the inevitable moment in the future where that person presses me on my reason why I did something different. Even if they are being friendly about it, the chore of explaining something that I don't even understand myself is exhausting.

I don't always know why I am led in a different direction, or why I sometimes stop a project and never return to it. The last thing I need is unintentional guilt by others asking what I'm doing and why I didn't do what I said I was going to do. Knowing that others know the specifics of what I'm working on binds and cripples me. I always do better work when I have no one aware of what I'm working on because then I have nothing to live up to, nothing to fulfill. Perhaps that is why I struggle so much with commissioned portraits.

The other problem I have when I tell someone what I'm working on in my writing or art is that, once I speak out the full project and give it life through verbal words, I lose interest. It feels like I already did it, that I gave it existence by merely talking about it and that there is no reason to actually carry the project out.

There is a strength in knowing that only I know and that I can take any path and even stop without anyone pointing out my inconsistencies or failure to finish what I said I was doing. I hate taking ideas out of the oven before they're done, before they're finished baking.

Ideas are fragile things. Don't overexpose them before they are ready and kill them in the process. Hemingway was right, at least for me. I lose it when I talk about it.

Labels: nanowrimo, writing

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Death by NaNoWriMo.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 1 comments link this post

How's NaNo coming? Ha. Right.

Labels: nanowrimo, writing

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NaNo: The looming threat.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 1 comments link this post

National Novel Writing Month starts tomorrow and I can't tell you how much I'm dreading it.

I don't have any clue as to what I'll be writing.

Earlier, my friend Corrine had given me the idea to write a story about a woman in which all her emails (spam included) were true. The idea has lots of possibilities and I don't feel like I'm completely taking another person's idea (with permission, mind you) because Corrine told me my practice of using the names from spam email for character names in my stories led her to this idea.

I'm not sure, though, if that's the story I want to do.

I do know, however, that Corrine is forwarding on spam email that is particularly humorous. I find it rather funny that I am getting second-hand spam from my friend. There is something inherently wrong with the situation but I can't quite put my finger on it.

Anyway, posting on the blogs shall be light and re-run filled. In the background, I'll be weeping.

Probably.

Labels: nanowrimo, writing

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Quit your bellyaching.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 0 comments link this post

That's something I heard growing up if I was in a moment of indecisive whining.

"Quit your bellyaching."

I would like to tell that to some of the people over at the NaNoWriMo forums. I've never seen such indecisive nonsense.

Either take part in NaNo or don't. Either go to a NaNo event or don't.

I'm no confident force of nature by any means, but I certainly didn't sit around wasting time posting on a forum trying to let a bunch of strangers tell me if they thought I ought to participate or not. Good grief.

I remember last year, I stopped by the forums once just to see what people were doing there and I found long posts about how people were having trouble finding time to write. Idiots. If they had time to write a post, they have time to write.

Here's a post that took me by surprise, and got me started on this:

"I'm debating attempting NanoWriMo this year, for the fourth year...fifth year? fourth year? I don't even remember. No, I definitely started as a freshman, so this must be year five.

okay, so anyway, I'm in Grand Forks, and I'm still on the fence, and I need some people to talk me into it, because, well, I'm going to be in NY over Veteran's Day (for 6 days), and then gone for Thanksgiving too, at which points, I will have no time to novel... Novel as a verb, interesting... and I feel like I'm going crazy with school as it is.

someone help me, now that I've introduced myself."

Here are some examples of posts on why participants in a certain region can't make it to the NaNo party:

"I'll try to be there if I can get a ride. I can't wait to finish up my driving lessons and get a car."

"I'll be there--do my best to stop and sit a spell. It's times like these that I wish I didn't have an 8:15 class M-W."

"I should be able to get there. Sadly, it's competing with trick-or-treating for weeknights not doing homework, but heck, it's the NaNoWriMo Kickoff party. In other words, you can probably reasonably expect to see me there. Now just to convince the parents..."

"Bummer it's on a Monday though, last year it was fun to go with my friends and then have a sleep over, as kids in highschool do sometimes, lol. I can't do that on a monday! Ah well, I'll still bring my friends along! It's still alright to bring non nanoers along right?"

Someone should take their passwords away and deny them access to the forum. Forums everywhere seem to attract people like this, and the people who respond with things like *hugs* and various emoticons and other crap, enabling all of this ridiculous behavior. This is what passes as discussion: excuse-making.

I know I sound harsh.

It's the same inward reaction I get in writers' group or in other such activities when people spend great amounts of time telling me why they couldn't get any writing done or get done what they were supposed to have completed. Just shut up already; never explain yourself. Quit making excuses.

If you didn't get it done, just say "I didn't get it done." If you can't make it to a NaNoWriMo party, just say "I don't think I can make it." If you aren't sure if you want to participate in NaNo, don't post on the forum explaining how busy your life is and if other people you've never met can decide for you if you should do it. Because if you don't know already, on your own, you shouldn't do it. And then, take what you may have learned here and apply it to all areas of your life.

People that make excuses for themselves are saying things, implying things, they don't realize:

Even though you got your assignment/project done, I didn't. I'm too busy. This means that you aren't and that you have time to waste while I don't.
I have so many options and requirements in my life that I just can't decide from all the choices in front of me whereas you were able to make a decision because you don't have as much in front of you to choose from.

I wonder if NaNo has any "adults" participating when I read such garbage, all the whining about school and tests and busy lives, and then I figure they're probably like me: not wasting their time posting to the forums like this.

There's no way you're going to finish 50,000 words if you can't make it to the starting line without a little propping up.

Summary: Don't explain yourself. Don't make excuses. Don't play yourself in a way to garner pity. If you find yourself unable to fulfill these three simple rules, you're not ready for the game. You really aren't.

Labels: nanowrimo, writing

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National Novel Writing Month 2006.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 0 comments link this post

Yes, I'm going to participate.

That means light blogging in general, many tearful and fearful mentions of NaNoWriMo, and possible re-runs of old posts to keep you occupied while I cower in fear before the cyclopean task of 50,000 words in November.

My friend Corrine, who will be featured on the Q&A section of the NaNo site on November 3, was kind enough to decide for me that I would be participating by purchasing me the handy and official NaNoWriMo kit. I'd recommend you look into The No Plot No Problem Novel-Writing Kit. It has cool stuff. It helps me be a little less afraid.

OK. Maybe not. Knowing that at least two others in my writing group will be participating is music to my ears, especially since I am very competitive and can't stand to see them finish and not me. Pure motives, to be sure.

This post will be the place to check my word count, find out how I'm doing, read excerpts if I have the courage to throw them out for you, and find other links. It certainly won't be static, unlike my deplorious (is that a word?) and craptastic (pretty sure that's a word) novel.

(Sigh.)

What have I done? I'm insane.

----------

Status Bar (goal is 50,000 words):

How you can help me:

Be my "accountability partner." Interested? Email me.
Send me emails or even snail mail to encourage me because it gets to be a bit much. I would even happily accept a sappy, girly card.
Chocolate is always welcome.
Just tell me I don't suck at writing and if I do, be nice about telling me the truth.
Join me in NaNoWriMo. If you're a student, they have a Young Writers Program for students, teachers or librarians. If you're an adult, just give it a go. Let me know and I'll add you to my NaNoWriMo friend list.

Links:

NaNo Blog Posts, 2006:

NaNo: Looming threat

Excerpts:

First
Second
Third

Labels: nanowrimo, writing

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NaNoWriMo: It's over and I made it.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 2 comments link this post

You'll be happy to know that now that November is over, you won't have to put up with so many post re-runs. The huge and overbearing monkey on my back, otherwise known as National Novel Writing Month, is over and gone.

I've been getting emails all month from curious readers wondering how I was doing with my NaNoWriMo novel challenge. I didn't answer because, to be blunt, I was doing terrible. I didn't keep up with the daily word count that I set as a beginning goal, my story was perfectly awful, and to make matters worse, my entire writing group was beating my pants off as far as word count! I'd put them up to the challenge and they responded with fervor.

I was shaking in my pants.

My sister would call, and towards the end of the phone conversation she would ask me how the novel as coming.

"It's terrible. I have my character stuck in a store fixing sewing machines."

Or someone else would inquire to me directly and I'd answer with a dejected face.

"Right now he's arguing with a guy in an alien museum over how to be a board certified UFO-ologist. It has to do with accurate details and probing. There's a proctolgist in there, too."

They'd raise their eyebrows.

"Before that I had my guy get into an argument with an insurance salesman about insurance for circus performers. The clowns, in particular."

The eyebrows would go higher.

"Well why'd you even ask," I'd snap.

Thanksgiving came and I was at a paltry 32,000 words. I never even attempted to resume writing until after all the family had gone home, which was Sunday, November 27. On Monday, I began typing but I only managed to whack out 3,000 words. All the other work I'd put off during Thanksgiving, from designs to various paperwork, had to be done, too.

I had Tuesday and Wednesday left. Tuesday, however, didn't work out because I was called in to sub. Today dawned bright and early and I was in a panic. There I was, at 35,000 words the last day of the 50,000 word contest. All the others in the writing group had made the mark.

For once, I just wanted to finish something.

And so....I did.

That's right. Today I typed 15,000 words and my hands and brain are numb but I made it. Thirty minutes before the deadline and I hit just over 50,000 words.

Now, some of you have requested frequent updates, excerpts and even access to what I wrote. That, my friends, won't be happening any time soon. I am so sick to death of the hideous beast I have written that I'm going to let it sit for a few months before even considering it again.

I was under pressure people! I wrote whatever came to mind! Japanese tourists! Cheesecake! The zoo! An atheist who owns a Bible Bookstore! A man at the Salvation Army who hates positive afirmation posters! It's all in there! It's a hideous monstrosity!

However, being forced to sit down and barf up a story, no matter how bad, was a great thing. Just like the NaNoWriMo site says, the contest puts an end to the one-day novelist, the writer who says "one day I'll write a book." I'm already thinking of a much better novel idea to start on my own time with no deadline, and I know I can do it.

After all, I just wrote my first novel.

Links:

Labels: nanowrimo, writing

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NaNoWriMo: The agony of knowing that you're writing crap.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 0 comments link this post

National Novel Writing Month is progressing. Eight days into it and I feel completely humbled and, happily, am losing my critical, snarky edge in cutting down the writing of others.

NaNoWriMo, the place to get your daily allowance of humble pie.

I have been discovering a few ways of working through this challenge, many of which are covered on Corrine's blog in her "NaNoWriMo Writing Tips" post. The list is excellent, although I confess I am not following #5, which involves using Microsoft Word.

Where am I at now? I hate all my characters. I wish they'd get interesting lives, forgetting that I am, of course, repsonsible for that. I realize I can't write dialogue or narrative or anything, actually. I want to kill them all off. I can't wait for December so that I can put this tragedy behind me. And I can't stop competing with Corrine for word count totals, though she is currently ahead of me.

Behind the scenes, NaNoWriMo can be very ugly.

I have discovered the truth in not writing in sequential order, though. The only way I've been able to make it through some tough spots is to write bizarre and strange scenes, later coming back when I am in a more level mood and filling in the transistions. I am writing completely blind, with no outline, pre-planned plot or character or story devices, all by the seat of my pants. That explains a lot of the mess I find myself in today in which a costumed character tries to give my hero a packet of children's stickers and asks him to meet him at the zoo plaza.

It's hard to pre-plan great story lines like that, I tell you.

Need some more tips for your NaNo project? Here's a site that helps you plot a mystery novel in the classic 12 chapter formula. If you're into formulas, that is.

Labels: nanowrimo

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NaNoWriMo: It's going very badly and I've killed Hemingway again.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 1 comments link this post

I'm glad you asked.

Yes, I am writing a very terrible story. You can click on the little logo in this post to keep up on my word count and simpering samples of writing.

How bad is bad? Let me share this evening's IM with my friend Corrine, the "friend" who convinced me to do NaNoWriMo.

corrine: So I'm writing away, and I'm thinking, "Oh, man, this is sooo stupid. No one will want to read a choose your own adventure. What am I thinking?"
me: How many words are you up to now?
corrine: Should I switch it to a traditional novel?
corrine: 3,500.
me: NO.
me: I'm sticking with my stinker. You stick with yours.
corrine: So it's not the dumbest idea ever?
me: No. Mine is.
me: By the way, I'm at 4090, and boy does it REALLY suck.
me: I thought it sucked before.
me: It's really bad now.
corrine: You are like lightning.
me: I have rhinos in my plot now.
me: It's that bad.
corrine: Rhinos.
corrine: Hmmm.
corrine: Oh, that Bob.
me: No. Dan. Actually, two Dans. And one went to the zoo.
corrine: But Bob is writing the book.
corrine: How did there get to be two Dans?
me: Bob is the author. So the book will be written under the pseudonym of Bob Nihm. It's the book he was writing in the book I wrote about Bob.
me: Confusing....
me: How did there get to be two Dans?
me: I wish I could tell you that.
me: I don't know.

What's my story? Remember Bob? Corrine had the great idea of actually writing the book that Bob writes in the book that I wrote about Bob.

Yeah.

Unfortunately, the tiny bit of writing I had Bob write was Pretty. Darn. Bad. Try using that for a foundation.

Why I do these things, I don't know. You can see the large toilet this masterpiece is headed to. Well, onto my next 2500 words. Hooray!

::Could someone just tell me how to write the rhinos out of the plot? I don't know how they got in there, and I don't know what to do with them.::

Labels: nanowrimo, writing

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NaNoWriMo: A great excuse to bring really awful stories into the world.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 2 comments link this post

National Novel Writing Month is upon us.

Of course, if you didn't sign up, I guess it's not upon you.

Yes, I will be eagerly writing all month, churning out 50,000 words with no hope of anything making sense, aiming not at creating the Great American Novel, but a novel of "Dear God let me just get through this so Corrine doesn't rag on me about not finishing" proportions.

That's a justifiably decent reason, I've no doubt.

What's my plot about?

I don't know.

Characters?

Ha! I'll let you know as soon as I do.

Genre?

It will fall from the sky, I know it.

In browsing the official NaNo web site, I've been a bit horrified by the comments in the many forums in which participants discuss their copious notes, plot outlines, character sketches and other "writerly" preparation.

Me?

I don't know. There'll probably be a cat in the story somewhere. Maybe some candy bars.

I thought about writing about the shredded pair of hunting pants one of the hunters left behind that I am now wearing, and how I dragged myself into town wearing these too-large pants and a tank-top and a pair of white socks with my flip-flops, but really. I have a hard time finding a plot device there.

"Oh my gosh! The pants! The pants!"

Who plans these things?! And why must we plan?! I truly believe that my crappy novel will be no more and no less craptastic than any of those who have planned their stories out to a perfect T.

"But Julie, we want to hear that you have some specifics planned, and that you aren't going to have yet another creative train wreck!"

Hmm. Well, I can promise you some verbs and nouns. Probably a few adverbs, though I want to go light on the "-ly." Prepositions, definitely.

I must sign off for now, crank up my word processing software, and begin second-guessing myself into a nightmare ordeal. Should be fun.

::You can follow my progress, including word counts and writing excerpts, here.::

::UPDATE | How's it going? Hmm.::

Labels: nanowrimo, writing

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National Novel Writing Month: What the heck.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 0 comments link this post

National Novel Writing Month terrifies me.

You don't make promises you can't keep, you know, and my good friend Corrine is "encouraging" me to sign up (i.e. make a promise) and take part in this adventure.

A 50,000 word novel. In one month. Talk about your pulp fiction.

It's a good thing I've quit all my jobs and my temporary job in Devils Lake comes to an end after tomorrow. I'll have all the time in the world to write truly bad fiction and use absolutely no contractions so I can squeak out that 50,000 word goal.

I've thought of some titles for my alleged novel:

50,000 Ways To Quit
How The Fact That Pictures Equal A Thousand Words Can Save Lives
Missing The Mark By 49,999
One Month To Insanity

Since misery loves company, I challenge you to sign up, take the dive, and emerged humbled but richer. Richer in the personal growth sense, and in no way the financial sense.

November looks to be terrible.

::There is an actual North Dakota NaNoWriMo blog someone has going. Check it out. In browsing the forums at the NaNo web site, I see that some people have their novel planned, titled, outlined or all of the above. Me? I dunno. I'll just start writing on November 1 and see where it takes me. Should be interesting. No need to overplan, I always say as my car starts on fire and goes over the edge of the cliff. Stay tuned to this blog, though, as the month of November progresses to see how I'm doing, if I can keep up, and for novel excerpts.::

Labels: nanowrimo, writing

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I'm putting together plenty of words.

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I would hate her if I didn't like her.

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Don't talk about it.

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Death by NaNoWriMo.

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NaNo: The looming threat.

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Quit your bellyaching.

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National Novel Writing Month 2006.

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NaNoWriMo: It's over and I made it.

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NaNoWriMo: The agony of knowing that you're writing crap.

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NaNoWriMo: It's going very badly and I've killed Hemingway again.

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NaNoWriMo: A great excuse to bring really awful stories into the world.

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National Novel Writing Month: What the heck.

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