Julie R. Neidlinger: Lone Prairie Art and Writing

Some of that spam is almost literature.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 0 comments link this post

Some of the spam email that arrives in my inbox reads very nearly like good writing. It makes absolutely no sense, but sounds as if it should. My friend Corrine had given me the idea of writing a story in which the whole premise rested upon the idea that the email of the main character was all true.

Imagine if this beauty that arrived today was true:

gamester how will he be looked upon by all sorts of people? Why, as a you will be in a great deal of good company, I would have you have the Cardinal, who was factious enough, was wise enough at the same time to disposition and in the case of scandal, as in that of robbery, the

of the world must, like the chameleon, be able to take every different Tell stories very seldom, and absolutely never but where they are very genteel and fashionable vices. He there sees some people who shine, and

their affairs of consequence. 'Les manieres nobles' imply exactly the if he is desired to explain the bon mot, his awkward and embarrassed Take care never to seem dark and mysterious which is not only a very self-defense. Force may, without doubt, be justly repelled by force, but
give me more real concern, than I am now capable of feeling upon any these mixed characters, the good part only makes people forgive, but not is Latin that is, that it was written by a Roman. By this rule, I might interested in the keeping of it. And it is certain that people of

in the eleventh and twelfth centuries, such as Malta, the Teutonic, the one can go into no company in Germany, without running against Monsieur meet with it? Her demands go no higher than to have her unquestioned admired. Even virtue, which is moral beauty, wants some of its charms if

Most long talkers single out some one unfortunate man in company somebody or other's sore place: for, in this case, there is no trusting that a general knowledge of them is fully sufficient. I would not suppose that you wanted, or could receive, any new instructions upon would probably have raised him but something higher than they found him look like a man. When I went abroad, I first went to The Hague, where Since barbarism drove them out of Greece and Rome, they seem to have prejudices of others, than give themselves the trouble of forming motly a thing is good company, that many people, without birth, rank, or will be known and nobody will take it upon your own word. Never imagine alliance between these two figures. The lady looks upon her empire as likeness, yet I think that I have skill enough in that kind of painting

course of these waters will set me quite right. But however and wherever Cautiously avoid talking of either your own or other people's domestic conversing freely with me by the fireside. In that case, you would Having in my last pointed out what sort of company you should minister upon his last instructions, puts them upon their guard, and will avoid gathering the people together, except when there was occasion, and

I suppose the spammer is using some kind of cut-and-paste algorithm which pulls text from whatever source is available, but in a strange way the random nonsense reads like literature. In fact, compared to some of today's fiction, it makes more sense.

My advice would be to delete your spam, but every once in a while, read it and marvel at how confused it leaves you. Your mind will want to make sense of it, but it won't be able to.