Julie R. Neidlinger: Lone Prairie Art and Writing

Quit your bellyaching.

written by Julie R. Neidlinger 0 comments link this post

That's something I heard growing up if I was in a moment of indecisive whining.

"Quit your bellyaching."

I would like to tell that to some of the people over at the NaNoWriMo forums. I've never seen such indecisive nonsense.

Either take part in NaNo or don't. Either go to a NaNo event or don't.

I'm no confident force of nature by any means, but I certainly didn't sit around wasting time posting on a forum trying to let a bunch of strangers tell me if they thought I ought to participate or not. Good grief.

I remember last year, I stopped by the forums once just to see what people were doing there and I found long posts about how people were having trouble finding time to write. Idiots. If they had time to write a post, they have time to write.

Here's a post that took me by surprise, and got me started on this:

"I'm debating attempting NanoWriMo this year, for the fourth year...fifth year? fourth year? I don't even remember. No, I definitely started as a freshman, so this must be year five.

okay, so anyway, I'm in Grand Forks, and I'm still on the fence, and I need some people to talk me into it, because, well, I'm going to be in NY over Veteran's Day (for 6 days), and then gone for Thanksgiving too, at which points, I will have no time to novel... Novel as a verb, interesting... and I feel like I'm going crazy with school as it is.

someone help me, now that I've introduced myself."

Here are some examples of posts on why participants in a certain region can't make it to the NaNo party:

"I'll try to be there if I can get a ride. I can't wait to finish up my driving lessons and get a car."

"I'll be there--do my best to stop and sit a spell. It's times like these that I wish I didn't have an 8:15 class M-W."

"I should be able to get there. Sadly, it's competing with trick-or-treating for weeknights not doing homework, but heck, it's the NaNoWriMo Kickoff party. In other words, you can probably reasonably expect to see me there. Now just to convince the parents..."

"Bummer it's on a Monday though, last year it was fun to go with my friends and then have a sleep over, as kids in highschool do sometimes, lol. I can't do that on a monday! Ah well, I'll still bring my friends along! It's still alright to bring non nanoers along right?"

Someone should take their passwords away and deny them access to the forum. Forums everywhere seem to attract people like this, and the people who respond with things like *hugs* and various emoticons and other crap, enabling all of this ridiculous behavior. This is what passes as discussion: excuse-making.

I know I sound harsh.

It's the same inward reaction I get in writers' group or in other such activities when people spend great amounts of time telling me why they couldn't get any writing done or get done what they were supposed to have completed. Just shut up already; never explain yourself. Quit making excuses.

If you didn't get it done, just say "I didn't get it done." If you can't make it to a NaNoWriMo party, just say "I don't think I can make it." If you aren't sure if you want to participate in NaNo, don't post on the forum explaining how busy your life is and if other people you've never met can decide for you if you should do it. Because if you don't know already, on your own, you shouldn't do it. And then, take what you may have learned here and apply it to all areas of your life.

People that make excuses for themselves are saying things, implying things, they don't realize:

Even though you got your assignment/project done, I didn't. I'm too busy. This means that you aren't and that you have time to waste while I don't.
I have so many options and requirements in my life that I just can't decide from all the choices in front of me whereas you were able to make a decision because you don't have as much in front of you to choose from.

I wonder if NaNo has any "adults" participating when I read such garbage, all the whining about school and tests and busy lives, and then I figure they're probably like me: not wasting their time posting to the forums like this.

There's no way you're going to finish 50,000 words if you can't make it to the starting line without a little propping up.

Summary: Don't explain yourself. Don't make excuses. Don't play yourself in a way to garner pity. If you find yourself unable to fulfill these three simple rules, you're not ready for the game. You really aren't.